Pokémon Picks, Sports Stars & Practical Partners

[00:00:00] Speaker A: Hey, everybody, and welcome to another episode of the Yapoff podcast. It's the sixth episode. I'm your host, Ted. Along with me, Sam Joe, and back from his assignment, John. [00:00:14] Speaker B: Yes. Yes. Huge assignment. [00:00:16] Speaker C: Family vacation noise now. [00:00:18] Speaker A: Yeah, I heard. [00:00:20] Speaker D: I got a. I got a notification that we were. We were responding to Ted's intro now, so. [00:00:25] Speaker C: Think I was. I was left off that chain. [00:00:27] Speaker A: Yeah, I was left off that chain. [00:00:30] Speaker D: Oh, I. I guess I'm just. I guess I'm just that tight with our executive producer. I guess may. [00:00:35] Speaker A: Maybe. Maybe next time we'll be back to normal programming. I. I'm going to try to avoid dating this podcast with sports because one of my friends was trying to describe this podcast to another friend, and they said they talk about movies and sports, which is untrue. I mean, we do talk about those things, but we're talking about. [00:00:54] Speaker D: One at a time, buddy. [00:00:56] Speaker A: Yeah, but also. But also, like, it was about movie and sport. Yeah, but also we. We did other topics like music and high school memories. It's. They're different. It's not just sports. I just like to use sports to date the podcast because otherwise I'll kill myself if I have to use, like, news headlines to date the podcast. You know what I mean? [00:01:18] Speaker B: Now we're demonetized. [00:01:20] Speaker A: Well, it's. We're not even monetized anyway, buddy. [00:01:23] Speaker B: No, when you're using language like that. [00:01:25] Speaker A: Well, we were already. We were already before the language. It's the adult tour. You can say whatever the heck you want. I was expecting Sam to say jizz or something, but. [00:01:40] Speaker C: Oh, well, I'm trying to save our monetization. [00:01:44] Speaker A: It's already too late. So I guess I'll date the podcast by saying the Switch 2 was announced. It's gonna cost $800 for. I'm not gonna get into political reasons, but that. That is gonna cost $900. Joe. [00:02:00] Speaker D: I thought this was a Minecraft movie review podcast. What is going on right now? [00:02:04] Speaker A: I've. I've seen so many videos of people just like I do. Obviously, Covid broke our brains and, like, people are just being raucous in the theaters for that movie and just recording. And I'm like, I'm so glad I don't need to see this movie because I'd lose my mind in the theaters. [00:02:22] Speaker C: Yeah, really brief aside, while we're. While we're talking about movies, I went to go see a movie yesterday, and the fire alarm went off five minutes into the movie, and so they kicked us all out and gave us a comp ticket. They wouldn't just restart the movie. Devastated. [00:02:37] Speaker A: Never happened to me before because they're on a timer. It happened to me when I saw Wolf of Wall Street. We got halfway through, the speakers blew out, and they're like, either you guys can wait for the next one and you'll get ticket free entry in, or you get a comp. And I looked at my parents and said, this movie blows. Let's get out of here. [00:02:56] Speaker D: What were you gonna ask me? [00:02:57] Speaker A: Instant reaction on the Nintendo Direct. [00:02:59] Speaker D: I loved it. I thought it was awesome. I think the Joy Cons are bigger, which I appreciate. You know, it was a little, little uncomfortable holding those teensy tiny Joy Cons of 4. I was watching the Treehouse Live events the next couple days where they're showing off the games like they usually do. Think of the old E3 presentations, you know, where they're playing the games. And Metro Prime 4 had me screaming at the top of my lungs, it looks amazing. It was gorgeous. The guy was like seamlessly changing from. From Joy Con mode to. To mouse and keyboard quote unquote mode where his right hand was used like a mouse. I'm very excited. I think not excited. The prospect of the price of games and not even talking about the cost of the Switch. I'm gonna try to get that bundle to save myself a couple of bucks. But I guess we're gonna have to start being a little bit more picky and choosy on what games we want to play. So sorry. Donkey Kong Bonanza. I'm not going to be able to partake because Mario Kart World and Metro Prime 4 are gonna. That's the two games I'm gonna be able to afford to purchase. [00:04:05] Speaker A: Oh, I'm. I'm just getting Donkey Kong with Dancer. I don't care. Metroid. I do not care about Mario Kart at all. [00:04:13] Speaker D: You could play as a cow. [00:04:16] Speaker A: Okay. I can do that in scribble dots. Ever heard of it? [00:04:22] Speaker D: It's not 80 bucks to tell you that. [00:04:23] Speaker A: Yeah, exactly. [00:04:25] Speaker D: I'm a fan. I'm a fan. [00:04:26] Speaker A: There were some other games that were announced that weren't 80 bucks, right? [00:04:30] Speaker D: Yeah. It seems to be a Nintendo Whatever. Whatever you. First party. I don't know what you'd call it. [00:04:36] Speaker A: Yeah, yeah, first party would be the. The correct term. It's insane that it's 70 bucks to buy games you already own to get them upgraded to Switch two versions. [00:04:46] Speaker D: I did see a tweet or. Excuse me, I saw a tick tock. I was just. I don't know If I sent you, I probably didn't. I forgot. And it was like. It was like Nintendo Switch 2 presentation in a nutshell. I wish I remember who it was, but the guy was like, Nintendo Switch 2 presentation in a nutshell. And he comes on screen, he goes, big Zelda fan, huh? Prove it. Buy it again, full price. [00:05:07] Speaker A: It's insane that. That's the. That's where Nintendo's at. [00:05:12] Speaker D: But they got me. [00:05:13] Speaker A: I won't be a day 1er on the switch 2. [00:05:16] Speaker D: Are you waiting for a Pokemon I'm. [00:05:18] Speaker A: Waiting version of the console? No, I'd be waiting for more games. [00:05:22] Speaker D: Okay. [00:05:23] Speaker A: Is where I'm at, because I'm not gonna just buy it and just play Donkey Kong and Metroid prime and be like, all right, I got. Now I have this console I spent 800 on until, like, Pokemon Za comes out or whatever. [00:05:37] Speaker D: Yeah, I am gonna feel like an idiot buying the Mario Kart World 1. And then three months later, four months later, they're gonna announce a freaking Pokemon one that if I just waited, I could have got. [00:05:48] Speaker A: Yeah, but that one's gonna cost twelve hundred dollars, so you're probably better off. [00:05:52] Speaker D: Yeah, I guess. [00:05:53] Speaker A: And, you know, it's, you know, a little apropos that we're talking Nintendo, because this episode's theme is Pokemon, not for it to be favored in any one specific way, because I'll remain quiet. I don't. [00:06:08] Speaker D: I don't. [00:06:09] Speaker C: I don't love Perez and my chances of winning this episode. [00:06:12] Speaker A: Don't worry. These. These questions, they're not about competitive viability. Who's got the best? Who's the best on Mike during Worlds. Is Wolfly Glick going to repeat? Is none of that stuff? Don't worry. It's very similar questions to the veins I've been asking. [00:06:31] Speaker D: Usually, Perez, just say, charizard. You got this. [00:06:34] Speaker B: Well, yeah, that. That's the number one strategy. This is coming from the guy that it doesn't fix the other drafts. [00:06:40] Speaker D: I do fix it. [00:06:42] Speaker A: You know, I. I liked it when. [00:06:43] Speaker B: Roz was already minus 10,000. [00:06:46] Speaker A: I liked it when Roz was on the podcast last week. 1 1. I liked it when Roz was here. Not saying I. I didn't have to deal with any draft fixing stuff. No controversies there. But, you know, we're back to it. You know, it's happy, happy to have you back, John. [00:07:02] Speaker B: Roz is one of your guys. He falls in line. He's. He's sticking with the company message, and he's a good guy. So of course I would expect him to say that. [00:07:10] Speaker A: But Roz did win the last episode. [00:07:13] Speaker B: Oh, shocker, shocker that one of your guys won by proxy. [00:07:18] Speaker D: You weren't even here. He's still allowed to be offended. It's. [00:07:22] Speaker A: It's life. But John, just because he took your place does not count as a win. [00:07:27] Speaker B: For you in the Ed who exudes imperialism. Just put Rosin as a proxy. Yeah, so if Roz won, then Ted won. And if Ted won, Ted won. [00:07:37] Speaker A: I didn't win. [00:07:38] Speaker B: You had a 50 chance. [00:07:41] Speaker A: But I don't win these. I don't win the non draft episodes. [00:07:45] Speaker B: How the polls always sway your way. [00:07:47] Speaker C: I would argue you shouldn't win the draft episodes either. [00:07:49] Speaker A: But why? [00:07:50] Speaker C: I'm not sure who the voting populace. [00:07:52] Speaker D: Wait, but hold on, hold on. First of all, you put me in a very precarious decision to defend Ted, which is something I don't often do. Yeah, but Ted's not even eligible to win non draft episodes. Yeah, because he's Tony Reali. [00:08:06] Speaker A: So I've devised the questions. I feel like if I have. [00:08:09] Speaker B: You're drinking the Kool Aid, man. [00:08:10] Speaker A: If I answer my own questions, I know how I want the questions to be answered. [00:08:17] Speaker D: This is crazy. [00:08:19] Speaker B: One day this will all be uncovered and you all say, wow, Perez was right. [00:08:23] Speaker A: Perez is wrong. As. As usual, as always, Perez is wrong. With that out of the way, let's get on to the first question. What type would your gym be? And who would your ace be? Who would be your. [00:08:38] Speaker D: Your. [00:08:38] Speaker A: Your guy? Your go to. I'm backed into the corner, bottom of the ninth inning. Who do I want? Game 7, World Series. Who am I starting? Let's. Let's hear it. [00:08:51] Speaker D: What type of Shohei Otani? [00:08:53] Speaker A: Yeah, what type of show? [00:08:54] Speaker D: What element? [00:08:55] Speaker A: Well, the Dodgers are blue. Dodgers are blue, so they're water type, obviously. The Pirates are yellow, so they're electric. There's a lot of water types I'm learning. [00:09:06] Speaker D: First of all, there's other blue colored elements. For example, the flying type is also associated with. [00:09:12] Speaker A: That's like a sky blue, though, so. But no one's really got a sky blue. [00:09:15] Speaker D: I guess that's the Royals. Royals are flying. [00:09:18] Speaker A: Well, the Royals are still a deep blue anyways. Joe, let me. [00:09:23] Speaker D: They're quite literally royal blue, but I don't know what you're talking about. [00:09:25] Speaker A: But yeah, yeah, that's why I'm saying royal blue is a darker blue, not like a sky blue is what I'm saying. [00:09:32] Speaker D: I feel uncomfortable in this, in, in this podcast. [00:09:37] Speaker A: Okay. [00:09:37] Speaker D: As I, I feel like I got. I Got. I got targets surrounding me here as the audience has. Has expectations. You have expectations. [00:09:47] Speaker A: I don't have expectations. [00:09:47] Speaker D: Perez is already judging me. [00:09:49] Speaker A: Perez has a gun trained on you right now. He is outside your apartment, ready to go. [00:09:57] Speaker B: Two guns. [00:10:01] Speaker A: All right, fine. John, go ahead. You can go first. You can. You can save your guns for later. Save your. [00:10:07] Speaker B: Yeah, you got it. No problem. If I'm right and. And my memory is a little wonky these days. [00:10:14] Speaker A: Yes. Yes. [00:10:15] Speaker B: I'm going. I'm going along the theme of the Fuchsia City gym back in red and blue version. And if I'm right, you can't just walk straight to the gym leader. [00:10:26] Speaker C: Yes. [00:10:27] Speaker B: Like, you have to. [00:10:28] Speaker D: You got. [00:10:29] Speaker C: You got shooters in front of you. [00:10:31] Speaker B: Correct. [00:10:32] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:10:32] Speaker B: Right. And like every good basketball team, you need shooters in the corners. Um, so, yeah, that's. That would be my theme. I don't like the choice of wheezing clothing. [00:10:44] Speaker A: Yeah, you can change. You can change the type if you don't like. [00:10:48] Speaker B: I understood the question. [00:10:49] Speaker A: Okay. No, I'm saying, like, you could keep that gym theme. I. You know what I'm saying? Like the invisible walls or whatever. [00:10:56] Speaker B: No, no. I got you the first time. [00:10:58] Speaker A: Okay. [00:11:00] Speaker B: I'm back. You don't have to re. Explain it for Joe. [00:11:07] Speaker A: The question's open to interpretation. You can answer however you want. [00:11:14] Speaker B: I would. I would mix it up. I would throw in, obviously, Charizard. Maybe star me. [00:11:23] Speaker D: Buzzer, buzzer. [00:11:28] Speaker A: We don't accept Charizard here. We. We rule under a new God. A different God, not Charizard. [00:11:34] Speaker D: Also, you have multiple types here. [00:11:36] Speaker A: Yeah, also you have multiple types. [00:11:37] Speaker D: You're a gym leader. [00:11:39] Speaker B: Oh, I have to keep one type, right? [00:11:40] Speaker A: Yeah, right. [00:11:41] Speaker D: Like, there can be the secondary type. [00:11:43] Speaker A: Yes, yes. [00:11:44] Speaker D: All of them have to share. [00:11:45] Speaker A: If you were flying type, you could still have Charizard. You'd still get bad. Take Buzz anyways. [00:11:50] Speaker B: Well, if I'm right, Charizard was not a flying type in red. [00:11:54] Speaker A: Yes, he was. [00:11:55] Speaker D: He was the whole time. [00:11:56] Speaker A: The whole time. [00:11:57] Speaker B: Was he. What was he? But he couldn't learn fly. [00:11:59] Speaker A: Yeah, Good. [00:12:00] Speaker B: In. In red. [00:12:01] Speaker D: Yeah. [00:12:02] Speaker B: No way. I'm gonna. [00:12:03] Speaker A: I'll hold you. You guys continue to yap. I will. [00:12:07] Speaker B: All right. [00:12:07] Speaker D: Yeah. [00:12:07] Speaker B: Look that up. [00:12:08] Speaker A: Research this for you. [00:12:09] Speaker B: There was one error. There was one game where he couldn't learn fly, and it was a catastrophe. No, I'll stick with the fire. I. I'll go with Charizard. Growlithe, Ponyta, and ditto. But ditto as Charmeleon. [00:12:28] Speaker A: That's not how ditto that's not how ditto works. But all right, I. I'll allow it. [00:12:33] Speaker B: No, no, no. [00:12:33] Speaker C: Let him. [00:12:34] Speaker A: Let him cook. [00:12:34] Speaker C: I love it. [00:12:37] Speaker A: Hey, John, I have confirmed in Generation One, Charizard could learn fly. [00:12:42] Speaker B: All right, then I'm missing something. There was. I'll look it up. You guys go over there. [00:12:47] Speaker D: Fun fact. [00:12:48] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:12:48] Speaker D: Growlithe cannot learn growl. Maybe that's a little fun fact. [00:12:52] Speaker A: Yeah. And a fun fact. Arcanine is called the legendary Pokemon. [00:12:57] Speaker D: Yes, he is. Even though he's not. [00:12:59] Speaker A: Yeah. Sam. Typing. And give me your ace. I'm assuming Charizard. Your ace, John. [00:13:04] Speaker B: Correct. [00:13:04] Speaker C: Okay, just pre warning you, Ted. I might get bad take buzzed for this one. [00:13:08] Speaker A: Okay? [00:13:10] Speaker C: So get your. Get your finger on the trigger. [00:13:12] Speaker A: I'm. It's always there. [00:13:14] Speaker C: Electric Style Gym. If you walk in the wrong direction on your way to the gym leader, you get buzzed. And nobody likes that. Very annoying for them. And when you make it up to me, Sam, the gym leader, my number one, even though it's a legendary Pokemon, is Zapdos. [00:13:38] Speaker A: As I've written in an upcoming. Upcoming video, only children use legendary Pokemon. [00:13:44] Speaker C: Well, guess what? Guess who's a child. [00:13:47] Speaker A: You. [00:13:48] Speaker C: I guess me. Yeah. And I guess if I couldn't do Zapdos because I'm a child, and that's forbidden in a game that is aimed toward children. Great. Give me. Give me Jolteon. [00:14:05] Speaker A: Ooh, yeah. [00:14:08] Speaker C: Try hitting the buzzer now. [00:14:09] Speaker A: I'm not. It's not there. [00:14:11] Speaker D: That's a great choice. [00:14:12] Speaker B: I know. [00:14:12] Speaker A: It's because it's not a bad answer. [00:14:16] Speaker C: I always like the electric ones, mostly just because, like, obviously you could only start with, you know, non electric ones. So when you finally got to uncover the new types, as you got further in the game, it was like, you know, like, unlocking new levels of a map, basically, but just with characters. And when I was, like, nine years old, I thought that was amazing. So would love to be the leader of a really annoying Electric style gym. [00:14:43] Speaker D: Okay. Okay. I like it now. Sweet. [00:14:47] Speaker A: Snipers have taken their position. They're ready to go. Joe. [00:14:52] Speaker D: So I have noticed that I have a tendency when I look through my favorite Pokemon. You guys can do this test online, too. You can rank all your favorite. [00:15:02] Speaker A: I've done that. [00:15:03] Speaker D: It's a fun time. [00:15:04] Speaker A: It is. Yes. It's a fun, like, hour and a half. Because there's a lot. [00:15:06] Speaker D: It does take a while. Yes. So I have a. I have an affinity for fighting types, apparently, as my top three favorite Pokemon of all time. One is Keldeo. Two is Lucario. And three is Infernape. So I also love Marshadow, the legendary. I'm not using Marshall. Don't give me the button. Don't give me the buzzer. But I would have a dojo style gym. Like, you know, think like the Hitmonchan Hitmonlee. You just. You just walk in. You're right. We're ready to fight. There's no games, there's no gimmicks. You're not gonna have to figure it out. We're gonna scrap. That's my gym. I'm ready. I'm ready to defend my town. And my ace would be Infernape. Because what's great about Infernape is it is statistically the strongest starter Pokemon that we have had. Technically, they're called first partner Pokemon, but I don't want to get into it. We're going to call them starter Pokemon for the conversation here. [00:16:10] Speaker A: I'm telling Pikachu that you're going. That. [00:16:12] Speaker D: I'm not following. Yes. Because of his speed, his stat distribution, his wide, wide attacks, like the wide variety of different types of attacks, and being a potential physical sweeper and special attacking sweeper. Very difficult for my opponents coming into the dojo, the Joe Dojo, to know what type of set I'm going to be running on my Infernape as my ace. [00:16:39] Speaker A: Well, Joe, I hate to say it, we got the same gym typing brother. [00:16:45] Speaker D: Are you fighting? [00:16:46] Speaker A: I love fighting types fighting. I've always thought you'd be like a. [00:16:50] Speaker D: Ghost kind of guy. [00:16:51] Speaker A: No, I love fight. There's something about fighting types that I just. I've always loved. Like, before the evolution got released, like, primeape has was like a Pokemon I've loved. [00:17:03] Speaker D: Mm. [00:17:03] Speaker A: And so, like, when he got an evolution, I was, like, stoked beyond belief. So my ace Pokemon would be Annihilape. The evolution of PrimeApe. For people who don't know. [00:17:16] Speaker D: I got it. I got. [00:17:17] Speaker C: Thank you for explaining. [00:17:18] Speaker A: Yes, he's a ghost fighting type because he gets so mad, he dies and becomes an Isle Ape. [00:17:24] Speaker D: And that's essentially Ted in a nutshell. [00:17:26] Speaker A: That's. And that's canon to Pokemon. That's what his Pokedex entry says. I believe that's what he looks like. [00:17:33] Speaker D: That's what he looks like to Sam and. And Perez. What are your thoughts? What are your thoughts? It kind of looks like Ted. [00:17:39] Speaker A: Honestly, I'm shaved, so I don't got the beard anymore. [00:17:42] Speaker D: Oh, okay, then never mind. [00:17:44] Speaker A: Yeah, but it would. It would be a fighting type. I'm like, I Would like it would be Annihilape scrafty or the evolution of it would be in there. I got a rep jet like Gen1 Hitmonlee. The better of the two fighting types you can get, you'd be in there. It is a hot take. Yes, I do. I do know. But yes it is. That is the point of the podcast answer. But here we go. Question number two. And I have some visual aids for this one. Are the new Pokemon designs bad or do we just lack the wonder and curiosity of a child? And you know, on the screen are some just bad Pokemon designs that people seem to really key in on going, wow, they don't have to juice anymore when they make a new Pokemon. Like regular bird ball, pile of goo trash. [00:18:38] Speaker D: It's so funny. It's funny that Pidgey gets dragged when Pidgeot looks awesome. You know what I mean? Like sure, Pidgey's just a pigeon, but like Pidgeot looks awesome. I've never seen a bird in my life that looks like Pidgeot. [00:18:51] Speaker A: I've seen a bird that looks like Pidgey. [00:18:56] Speaker D: I've seen a ball that looks like. [00:18:57] Speaker A: Well, you know, I have workout balls. I know what a ball looks like. [00:19:04] Speaker D: This is a. It's a different kind of question because like really what it comes down to is we have to ask a real life 10 year old currently what their thoughts are on the Pokemon. [00:19:17] Speaker A: Yeah, they're not playing Pokemon. They care about the Minecraft movie. [00:19:20] Speaker D: That's fair. [00:19:21] Speaker A: And Roblox fair too. [00:19:23] Speaker B: Execute is also like just lazy. [00:19:25] Speaker A: Yes, yes. I always bring up this point because like they always keana like do you know, obviously Joe hears it a lot with like just the new games while look at trying to think are they trying anymore? Yeah, they even trying it more. And like I'm always just like have you guys seen like ball, like metal ball with magnets. Like there are, there are bad designs but it's not just unique to the new ones, bro. [00:19:53] Speaker D: Listen, for like one that gets a lot of flack is like Toucan in right? It's literally a Toucan bird. Like the Toucan Sam like from cereal literally looks just like him. But that's what they're going for, right? So some of the times they're just matching real life stuff. For example, which I had learned just a couple weeks ago for we Talked about Gen1 designs. There's a seal. There's a seal in the game called Seal, right? And then it evolves into a Pokemon called Dugong, which apparently is an actual animal on this planet. There's an animal called a dugong. [00:20:28] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:20:29] Speaker D: So like, that is how simplified some of those Gen 1 Pokemon were. [00:20:34] Speaker A: So I guess, like, really the question comes down to are we cherry picking because we're older and are nostalgic for Gen1, which there, there's an obvious answer to that. [00:20:45] Speaker C: Right. So my thought on this is like, I don't think the designs are necessarily bad or boring. I mean, there's only so much you can do to evolve what a bird looks like. You know, for me it's more. The names can be super lazy, which Joe was sort of pointing out a little bit. Like, you know, there's two different Snake Pokemon that are just different forms of like snake spelled backwards or like. [00:21:10] Speaker D: Yeah. [00:21:11] Speaker C: You know, like Joe said, there's. There's seal, which is a seal. Like, to me, that's more like, like, come on, guys, like, try a little bit harder. Like, I think the designs are whatever. Like, I'm not gonna object too much to, you know, oh, they haven't evolved what Pidgeotto looks like from 1999 too much to now in the newer generations. And it's just like, it's fine. [00:21:34] Speaker D: I think there's a bit of a, you know, like these Gen 1 Pokemon, like, they're, they're the Bill Russells. They're out here playing against Plumbers and whoever. So like, there are. Cool. Everyone loves Mewtwo, Charizard, Dragonite. Right. Jolteon, as Sam said. Like, there are, there are bangers. There are bangers from Gen 1, but you know, there's a lot of Plumbers and, and carpenters in Kanto also. Like. [00:22:02] Speaker B: No, you're right, Joe. I think like Voltorb had to drive a cab in the off season. Obviously was something that they had to deal with in Gen 1. Dgong, I think, like, was a doctor. [00:22:18] Speaker D: And could only play in home games. [00:22:20] Speaker B: Yeah, right. Yeah, it was, it was really odd. He was on a minutes limit. I'm with Sam too. I think the names kind of get a little. A little tiresome. I mean, listen, it's 600 Pokemon, right? Or how many, how many Pokemon are there now? [00:22:35] Speaker D: You wish, brother. There's a thousand. 35 of them. [00:22:39] Speaker B: Yeah. I mean, in a thousand of 35 of anything, you're gonna have one or two. Just lazy phone it in. I mean, there's an ice cream Pokemon. How Nobody's just eating that Pokemon makes no sense to me. And I love Vanillish, but like, you would just think. And by the way, just, I mean, if we're gonna get a little meta here. The laws of Darwinism just don't apply to Pokemon because, like, Vanillish would have just been extinct a long time. [00:23:07] Speaker A: What is he? What is he? What's the evolution there to, like, stop predators from attacking it? To look more delicious. [00:23:15] Speaker D: Look more delicious. [00:23:17] Speaker B: He'd have to have, like some sort of gluten repellent. Right? Like, he would have to. [00:23:23] Speaker D: You'd have to taste terrible. [00:23:25] Speaker A: Yeah, yeah, it's Vanillish. Gluten free. One is the most important question when talking about the. [00:23:31] Speaker C: Maybe vanilla is just poisonous to Pokemon. Like how dogs can't eat chocolate. [00:23:36] Speaker D: Like, that's a good point. [00:23:39] Speaker C: Mewtwo tries some ice cream and it's just instantly, like, vaporized. Like, maybe it's just. That's their universe. [00:23:44] Speaker B: And I, and I blame the Kanto public school systems for not educating us correctly on that. God knows where Professor Oak was. That's. That's a good point there, Sam. Yeah, listen, you just, you just get lazy. I mean, also, let's be Honest, in Gen 1, they just named their Pokemon off of how the Pokemon sounded. Like, Charizard just said Charizard. So they said, okay, we're gonna name him Charizard. Like that same thing with Squirtle and Pikachu. So, yeah, that's. I don't know what my point is, but I'm making it. [00:24:19] Speaker A: I. No, I'd see what you. I see what you're saying is there is just. It's. I feel like Pokemon is a product of. Is a. It's a. What am I trying to say? [00:24:31] Speaker D: It's. [00:24:31] Speaker A: It is. Everything about the designs is a product of its own success. Like, like, they, they like, it's just like, oh, I can't believe they made a key Pokemon. I'm like, yeah. Or, dude, they got a. They're at like, Pokemon. It's 500. It's a miracle they didn't get to key in like 300. Like, be thankful. [00:24:56] Speaker D: Yeah. Like Trubbish, who's just a pile of trash. Or vanilla. It's just ice cream, right? That was Gen 5. They made it five generations before that. You don't hear too many complaints about. About the Hoenn Pokedex, right? Or the Sinnoh Pokedex about, like, the simplicity of it. And Gen 5 was intentionally simplistic. And back to the Kanto roots where there were a lot of simple designs. [00:25:22] Speaker A: You also have to remember for gen 5, they made an effort to like, make 100. Like, I feel. I. Correct me if I'm wrong. Joe Gen 5's the Pokedex with the largest new Pokemon in the game because they wanted a wholly new Pokedex with no returning Pokemon for the, you know. Correct. Until the post game. [00:25:45] Speaker D: Yeah, they had 150 new Pokemon where like different games, like X and Y only had, I think it was 60 Pokemon. But then it gets up more if you count the Mega Evolution designs. And sun and Moon is less than 100 and like pretty much now. And I think designs are cooler now, quote unquote cooler. They're maybe over designed. Some of the. If you were to look. If like Perez looked at the scarlet and violet Pokedex and looked at the designs, you'd say, wow, they put like, they put some effort into here, but they may not feel as iconic or as cool as they used to because it's kind of like it feels like they're filling out a Pokedex now and like just trying to get the numbers in. [00:26:24] Speaker A: But. [00:26:25] Speaker D: But sometimes when they do put intention behind a design like Armarouge or Ceru or Golden Go, you know, sometime Dondo as well. And like there are some things in SC about and in the recent games that you're like, okay, somebody cooked here. [00:26:38] Speaker A: I'm definitely in. The people who complain about Pokemon designs need to go touch grass is how I feel because it's just. [00:26:47] Speaker D: I will say though, the last two generations, the last two games, when I did my like first playthrough, I just used old Pokemon. So maybe that's besides the starter. [00:26:57] Speaker B: Right. [00:26:58] Speaker A: I always try to use Pokemon, new Pokemon, I make it. [00:27:01] Speaker D: So maybe that's me as an old head. That's me, you know, as an ankh, whatever. In the first take universe, however, we want to explain it where I just stick with what I'm comfortable with and I don't give new Pokemon a chance. Maybe I need to be a little more open here. [00:27:15] Speaker A: I always with intention use new Pokemon when I play these new games because like, that's the point. I want to play with the new guys. [00:27:25] Speaker D: Nah. Give me Tyranitar, baby. [00:27:27] Speaker A: See, you're boring. Question three, who is the most practical Pokemon to have in real life? [00:27:34] Speaker D: Oh, what is. What does practical mean in this sense? [00:27:40] Speaker C: Yeah. Do you mean like as a pet or like to deploy against your energy. [00:27:43] Speaker D: For a business or not to not. [00:27:46] Speaker A: For as a. I. I don't mean as a pet and I don't mean as to deploy against my enemies. I'm eating like you have a Pokemon. Well, to help with day to day, like do your laundry, cook your food, not deploying not to, like, be, like. I'm not even gonna say what I want. [00:28:11] Speaker D: You're not gonna, like, all the gardevoir answers about to come out? [00:28:14] Speaker A: Yeah. No. Oh, I'm. That's fingers on the buzzer, buddy. [00:28:18] Speaker D: I'm going. All right, I'm walking in. Ivysaur. Okay, this is what I. And I've held this opinion maybe for like, like 20 years at this point, when someone says, like, if one Pokemon could exist. Now, here's the thing. If I lived in the Pokemon world, I don't want to be ash Ketchum. I don't want to be dealing with legendaries and. And falling for off the cliffs and being. Needing to be saved by gods and. And all the crazy stuff. And the whole world is that, you know, the seconds away from being destroyed. I just want to, like, you know, have a little garden, live my life, do, you know, do what's best for me. And I think Ivy store is a good middle ground because, like, it could help you with your garden, your. Your plants and your. Your crops and everything. It's going to be helpful there, putting the seeds down, the bullet seeds and whatnot. It's not. It's not as big as Venusaur, so, like, you can keep it in the house. You can keep the Ivysaur in the house because Venusaur might be a little more difficult to. That'd be like having a. What's one of those big dog breeds? Like the mastiffs? Like a mastiff or whatever. [00:29:22] Speaker A: Come. [00:29:22] Speaker D: Yeah. Compared to Ivy stores, a little more, let's say, mid tier. Mid tier size. Like. Like a retriever or something like that. I don't know. I'm just saying it's a little easier to fit in the house. It can grab items off the shelf for you if you're. If I'm in the middle of cooking, I need to go get, you know, add the adobo or whatever. It can use its vines to open the cabinet and grab it for me. I'm picking Ivysaur. [00:29:47] Speaker B: I have a few. Yeah, go ahead, Sam. [00:29:50] Speaker C: Yeah, this is more of a. Well, if I'm not using it as a pet, I'm not using it against my enemies. I'm going to use it to enrich my personal life. And I have devised a way where I never have to deal with the MTA again. I never have to deal with commuting, renting a car, dealing with tsa. I am going to use Alakazam's teleport power to get me around wherever I need to go, whenever I Need to go. And it will save me many, many thousands of dollars. And I'll have a cool friend also. [00:30:26] Speaker D: Wow, that's pretty interesting. [00:30:27] Speaker C: Real jealous of me with. Oh, hey, it's a teleport guy. Like, yeah, cool. [00:30:35] Speaker D: He could read people's minds. So you could have conversations with the Alakazam. [00:30:38] Speaker C: You know, I don't, I don't need that. I just need to get around. I don't want to deal with the MCA anymore. The mind reading is great. He's very powerful. He can learn all sorts of. But. [00:30:49] Speaker A: Well, I didn't know you were just like Mayor Adams and Sean Duffy, who are so afraid of the subway. I'm just, I. I'm. [00:30:58] Speaker C: It's not a fear thing. It's. You know, sometimes it's a convenience. There's. There's a subway near me and you walk down the steps and says, oh, the next one. Train isn't for 12 minutes. Not anymore. Alakazam. Let's go. Like, we're out of here. Like, it's. I mean, the question was, who's the most practical Pokemon? And as someone who is getting around a lot, give me the teleport. [00:31:27] Speaker D: That's pretty practical. [00:31:28] Speaker A: Makes the commute to Stanford a little easier. [00:31:31] Speaker C: Oh, that too. Like, what, do I want to spend, what, an hour and a half on Metro north if I end up on a local. No, I just want to snap my fingers and take me to edit 12, buddy. Let's go. [00:31:44] Speaker B: That's a good point. And then you wouldn't mind staying a little later at work too, because you're not going to miss a train. [00:31:49] Speaker A: All right, all right. Second five seconds. Second five, sit. Alakazam's got me out. I look at him and give him a nod. [00:31:58] Speaker D: Oh, sorry. Can only teleport twice per day. Can't come back in the office. Can have to be an email buddy. [00:32:05] Speaker B: I think you could help with tasks too. Alakazam. You know, smart, smart. Help break things down. [00:32:12] Speaker C: Well, I, I took the. Oh, I need. I need a Pokemon to open my cabinet for me, so I didn't want to tread on that water, so. [00:32:19] Speaker B: That's true. [00:32:20] Speaker D: And I have a garden. It's not just constant cabinet door opening. [00:32:24] Speaker B: I'm gonna go with Chansy. Chansy is just like a good live in nurse. [00:32:32] Speaker A: Also, X. [00:32:34] Speaker B: Are very expensive right now. [00:32:37] Speaker C: It's crazy. [00:32:38] Speaker B: Yeah, yeah. And they're a good. You know, Chance, he's good cook, apparently. I don't know. Never been to a Chansey restaurant. Although they're tough to get in the reservation. Chansey's a good one. I think it's Gen1, so it's right up my alley. I know what Chansey looks like. You can give Chansey its own bedroom or just put her in a closet, keep her in the kitchen. So that works. [00:33:06] Speaker D: He does just sit there next to nurse Joy forever. She doesn't seem like she is upset about it. Like, she's. She's. She's posted up. [00:33:16] Speaker B: I heard she also comes with her own prescription book. So, like, if you ever need scripts, you know, that's good. Yeah. So I'm going with Chansey just for that. Alakazam was my first choice. And then right behind that was Rotom, who just, you know, can control. Like, if you have a smart home, Rotom is the best Pokemon there. [00:33:39] Speaker D: So, yeah, I think none of us get this point because Rotom is probably the most practical Pokemon because there's 800 million different Rotom devices that if we're asking practical Ted. [00:33:52] Speaker A: Yeah, but my phone does what Rotom. [00:33:54] Speaker B: Does, so, you know, Alakazam does too. [00:33:57] Speaker A: He cannot. Alakazam cannot take me from my apartment in Brooklyn to at A12 in Sanford, Connecticut. [00:34:06] Speaker B: No, no, you're right about that. But does have the knowledge. Like, if you want to do. If you want to look up different routes, you want to look up different things. [00:34:13] Speaker A: Alex, my phone can also do my taxes, but also I have to. I also have to pay to get my taxes done, whereas Alakazam will just do my taxes. [00:34:24] Speaker B: You think Alakazam is free in this economy? [00:34:27] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:34:28] Speaker D: Wow. Ted is a real market. [00:34:32] Speaker A: Well, no, because, see, I'm about to. No, see, I'm. This is why I'm too smart for you guys. I. The most practical Pokemon is Meowth because I'm using Payday on all the rich fat cats get a bunch of free money. [00:34:44] Speaker D: Oh, it just crashed. Well, the economy's already crashed economy. Anyway. Ask the confederacy what happens when you just introduce more currency. [00:34:52] Speaker A: I'm not into. No, Joe, I'm not introducing more currency. [00:34:54] Speaker D: That's what painting does. [00:34:56] Speaker A: No, I'm stealing. I'm stealing money. [00:34:59] Speaker D: Oh, okay. [00:35:00] Speaker B: His idea of fixing the economy is just print more money. [00:35:03] Speaker A: No, I'm going to finance bros. I'm going to the rich people. I'm using payday on them. They're dropping. They're dropping however much money payday scales too, and then that money's mine. [00:35:16] Speaker D: Well, as it yours, it should be given to. Given to the community. [00:35:20] Speaker A: Well, that's why. That's why you pay taxes. [00:35:22] Speaker D: Not anymore. [00:35:22] Speaker A: What do you mean not Anymore. I still pay taxes because I'm hiring. [00:35:25] Speaker D: I'm hiring Sam's Al Kazam. [00:35:27] Speaker A: I'm still. Well, like, just be. What? Just because you're hiring the Alazam doesn't mean the IRS doesn't know how much you owe the government. [00:35:35] Speaker B: Alam has a little green visor. [00:35:38] Speaker A: Yeah, yeah. With the. He's. He's. He doesn't use a calculator. He uses an abacus. [00:35:43] Speaker D: Yes, exactly. [00:35:44] Speaker C: He's my chauffeur and my cpa. How is that not the most practical? [00:35:48] Speaker D: That's very practical. [00:35:49] Speaker B: Good point. [00:35:50] Speaker A: Question number four. If you were in charge of Pokemon, would you have picked to be the mascot of the games? Not like, who would you have picked to be the guy? [00:35:59] Speaker C: This is like to be the Pikachu. [00:36:01] Speaker A: Yeah, that's. [00:36:03] Speaker D: We gotta limit it to. [00:36:05] Speaker A: Yes. It is Limited Gen1 here, right? Yeah, I would say yes. But if you want to throw out a different of newer Pokemon, I'm not gonna ding you for it. [00:36:16] Speaker D: It's a tough call. It is 150 of them, Ted. Or more and more to see. [00:36:22] Speaker A: Because for me, the answer I would pick Snorlax. [00:36:26] Speaker D: Really? [00:36:26] Speaker A: Yeah, because I have to think about it in a character design aspect, which is like, you want round. This is why fat Pikachu was the goat. You want round, like shaped Pokemon because they're more inviting and more friendly to look at. And who's the route besides Voltorb? Who's the roundest mfer out there is the big fat guy. [00:36:52] Speaker D: Your round. Your round theory also works as Reyes, we know the. The old adage that Clefairy was supposed to be the mascot of the series. And Clefairy is very round. Yeah, Pikachu's roundish. [00:37:06] Speaker A: At least chubby old Pikachu was the real. My real Pikachu, my real king. [00:37:11] Speaker D: The real. The real Pikachu. [00:37:13] Speaker B: And I think I might be stepping on Joe's toes, but I'm gonna go with Lucario. Lucario, very edgy, but lovable. He's got his own movie, huge in Japan. And like the biggest thing about marketing to children, and this is a big reason why they made Ash and Misty so similar was especially when Pokemon was coming out, was that market research dictates that boys will only play for like boy specific themes and girls will play with boys toys, but boys won't play with girls toys. So like, that's why Barbie never connected with boys. But like girls will connect with boys toys. So for instance, they made Misty just another Ash, except she just was a little Bit more feminine. And I think you could do the same thing with Lucario. Like, everybody likes Lucario. Hard fighting type, more action oriented than Pikachu, who just sits around. And I think, like, there's just like a power system, like I said, has its own movie. And you're connecting the generations. Because if I knew of Lucario in Gen 1, he'd be my favorite Pokemon. And I know he's many current Pokemon fans, his favorite Pokemon. So I think, like, that's a good bridge between our generations and like, the newer generations. [00:38:40] Speaker A: I was gonna ding you, but I like your answer, so I will not. [00:38:44] Speaker D: Look our easily a top five most popular Pokemon for sure. Out of at all thousand plus of them, including with me, you know. [00:38:52] Speaker A: Yeah, well, not for me. [00:38:53] Speaker C: I think I'm gonna. I might get dank for this answer. But I think, like, you guys have already mentioned the, like, oh, we need something like, cued appeals to lots of people. But also, people always want what they can't have. And that's why I think MEW would be the best option where you have this as the, you know, the quote unquote, face of the game. And it's something that you can't really experience in the game. I mean, I know you can do glitches and whatnot to get MEW in red and blue, but the idea that you have everybody working towards, like, okay, we're trying to get to 151, and it's not even something you can really get until. Whoa, whoa. The. The Next Generation or of course, the movie. But I think that that would be. That'd be my choice if we had to execute Pikachu and pick a new mascot. [00:39:46] Speaker A: We're not executing Pikachu. [00:39:50] Speaker D: Pikachu can still exist in that one patch of grass in Viridian Forest. It's cool. For Pikachu. [00:39:56] Speaker C: Or in the entirety of Yellow. [00:39:58] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:39:59] Speaker D: That's where you catch it. That's where you can catch it. I think it's only like a. It's a very low percent chance to show up. [00:40:03] Speaker A: Yes, yes, yes. It's a. Yeah. Joe, who is the mascot? Who's your new boss? [00:40:09] Speaker D: I don't care if it gets dinged. That's right. I won't be saying Pikachu anymore. [00:40:12] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:40:13] Speaker D: When I say, oh, thank. Oh, Pikachu wants this. Or Pikachu said this. Or shout outs. Pikachu, whatever. This. I don't care if it gets dinged. This is the correct answer. The answer is. Eevee Evie is arguably already the secondary mascot with how Iconic. There are literal sets and sets and sets and sets of TCG continually for the rest of time built around all Eeveelution designs. It gives kids decisions. It gives them creative choices. Especially we go Back to Gen1, where you and all your friends on the playground can all make different decisions on what you evolve your Eevee into. I mean, yeah, I think you have eight evolutions there. If it was the mascot, there'd probably be even more. You might have one. One of every type of evolution for the entire Pokemon typing spectrum. And we's already pseudo co mascot because of let's go Pikachu and Eevee. Right. It's showing how popular it is. And I think at this point, it's. It's a. It's a slam dunk. And I. I love. I love Eevee. I feel like everyone loves a good little Eevee action. [00:41:23] Speaker A: I was debating about dinging you. I couldn't. I think at the end of the day, I couldn't bring myself to do it. [00:41:28] Speaker D: You didn't have the heart to do it. [00:41:29] Speaker A: I didn't have the heart. [00:41:29] Speaker D: I respect it. [00:41:31] Speaker A: Question 5. Is the Charizard card only worth a lot? Because we gassed him up as kids and they recognize that. If we were all about Butterfree, would that card be the big one? I know I asked you this before, Joe, but I would like it on official channels. [00:41:49] Speaker D: I guess we can answer the question. What other valuable cards are there from the Retro era besides the Charizard? Because it's not just that it's Charizard, it's also a rarity thing. Right? Because those cards were rarer than the Weedles and the Pidgey Pidgeys and stuff in. In the. In the card game. [00:42:10] Speaker A: Yeah. Well, it's obviously Charizard's the big one, but, like, there aren't ones that are, like, as valuable as that. Like, the legendary birds are up there, but, like, nowhere near, like the glazing we give the Charizard card. [00:42:27] Speaker C: I think it's two things. I think one is just like, you know, obviously when you're playing red and blue, you only have three options to start the game. So a lot of people pick. Charmander evolved into Charizard. They loved him. And then, oh, I gotta get this. As a card. But also just like on the card itself, like, Charizard just straight up looks really badass. Like, he's looking to the side, his tail's on fire. Like he's ready to up and not, you know, the Butterfree. No offense to Butterfree, like doesn't really convey the same thing. [00:42:59] Speaker A: Butterfree was the example, obviously. [00:43:01] Speaker C: Right, right, right. But just like, in general, like not every single Pokemon card is meant to give off the same sense of like fearlessness, intimidation and just the raw cool factor that the Charizard card did. [00:43:19] Speaker D: It does look really cool. [00:43:23] Speaker C: And that's why, that's why it stuck with us as a kid. And that's why 20 years later everyone's like, oh, I got to get a Charizard card and pay thousands of dollars for it. [00:43:35] Speaker B: Yeah, I'm with Sam. The first Pokemon card set that I got had the holographic Charizard in it. And I wish I saved it and put it in some laminate and then sold it for $400,000. But no, I'm with you. Like it had all the ingredients. It's a perfect card. It's a no nonsense Pokemon. It's a popular Pokemon. So yes, I, I think, I think that had a lot to do with it that like, because there are, I'm sure there is a butterfly, a butter free brigade out there that you know, wants all justice for Butterfree or other Pokemon Sandslash, Tangela, Execute. But there's nobody like Charizard. He's a one of one, a unique character. Everyone always, the conversation always finds its way back to Charizard. So yes, for those reasons I think Charizard is worth a lot because it is a unique and defiant Pokemon of that era. [00:44:39] Speaker A: Was it just society's fault that it was this popular and not like a Pokemon didn't really like they printed cards. All, you know, all the starters, final evolutions got Holographics and it was just like we, everyone had gravitated to Charizard. [00:44:52] Speaker D: But to a point, right? Like even, even other as popular or cool looking or even rarer Pokemon, right? Like Mewtwo and Mew and other stuff and the, and the birds, like they might have had the same rarity within the opening of the packs or whatever, but there is something unique to Charizard. So you know, to my answer here, like the market dictates what the value is, right? And the market has determined that Charizard is inherently more valuable than other Pokemon. So I don't think it's pure Gaslighting. [00:45:28] Speaker A: No, I'm not saying gaslight. I'm saying it's like because like Pokemon didn't like the way I'm saying is like Wizards of the coast or whoever's printing the cards weren't like, yeah, let's make Charizard even More difficult to find. It was more like we as like society as consumers are. The reason it's valued is what I was getting. [00:45:51] Speaker D: I would agree that that was us, that was as, as a society created the value. The same way as I see with all these sports cards where, yeah, a guy, you know, you sell a card for or you, you hit a card and it's $15,000 and then he goes for a 1 for 25 stretch and now it's a, it's a $13,000 card. You know, like it's very fickle and based off of people's perception. [00:46:14] Speaker A: It's never gonna go. Charizard's never hidden below them in doza line. [00:46:22] Speaker B: I would argue that Charizard is the Barry Bonds of Pokemon in that he was very ornery, only showed up when he wanted to. [00:46:30] Speaker A: Can't teach other Pokemon how to hit. [00:46:34] Speaker B: Exactly. You have to say about that show. [00:46:39] Speaker D: I, I listen, I respect it. I respect the Perez. I respect your Pokemon. We've, we've had podcast discussions before on Pokemon and I respect your, your knowledge. Now you did think that Charizard was not a flying type. So today has not been your strongest performance compared to prior projects. [00:46:56] Speaker A: No, he knew that he was. [00:46:58] Speaker B: I would like to correct for the record, I knew that he was eventually. I, I just remember there being one game where you couldn't make him fly. Now, I don't know if in red and blue you couldn't make him fly, but then in yellow you could. Does that still. [00:47:10] Speaker A: I just told you. Yeah, I just told you gen 1 you could teach him fly the whole time. [00:47:15] Speaker B: One game. There was one game. Maybe it was Ruby and Sapphire. [00:47:17] Speaker D: Was it, was it made, was it made by Nelson Mandela? Was this a Mandela effect game? That makes you think. [00:47:26] Speaker A: Can you also catch the Berenstein Bears? [00:47:30] Speaker B: Yes. [00:47:31] Speaker A: Now, before I get to the last question, under the wire, winner of the last episode, Mr. Not on the books. Not, not crooked in any way. Straight up. Straight up. Guy Ross has come in with a question after. After two questions, essentially ones I had asked. We're back. Third. Third time's a charm comedy. Rule of threes. He comes in with. In a world where a Pokemon goes bad and begins to kill humans, who would be the one and what would its motive be? [00:48:05] Speaker D: Wow, Nice. Happy. [00:48:07] Speaker C: Only there was some sort of movie. [00:48:09] Speaker A: About this detective Pikachu and Pokemon. The first movie. Yes, I'm, we're all familiar. [00:48:13] Speaker D: First of all, there are many Pokemon attempting to kill many people in many of the Pokemon movies. This is not a mewtwo specific. They. There's been 20 movies made and I'd probably say in about 18 or 19 of them there's been existential murderous threats. [00:48:27] Speaker A: Pokemon 2000, they're not trying to kill people. Cuz they're the three. The three birds are just trying to kill Lukia Entei, the Pokemon unknown in the legend of Entei. Is that what it's called? That guy's not trying to kill people. [00:48:47] Speaker D: It's called Pokemon the third movie. [00:48:49] Speaker A: Okay, thank you. I. I wanted to. Is it really just the third movie? So you get, you get Pokemon the first movie. Pokemon 2000 and like. Yeah, third one. And then what's the fourth one? Pokemon and the ashes. Oh, forever. And then, and then the next one's Pokemon 5. He kisses Latinos heroes. [00:49:11] Speaker D: Yes. [00:49:11] Speaker A: Is that the one where he kisses the Pokemon? [00:49:15] Speaker D: Yes. I mean Mewtwo. Me too. Did do it. He did. He, he struck back and say like, as they like to say. [00:49:22] Speaker A: Hold on, hold on. [00:49:24] Speaker D: No, no, that's not my answer. That's not my answer. I can't get dinged for something that's not my answer. Ted, look at the rule book. [00:49:31] Speaker A: Yeah, yeah, the one I made. [00:49:34] Speaker D: Yeah, exactly. [00:49:36] Speaker A: Don't judge. Don't jump down my throat for saying. [00:49:38] Speaker D: That has the imaginary or not. What's the, what's the hidden text called? Like we gotta like. No, no, like when you were a kid, you know, like those little mystery books for your kid. Like you had to like squeeze lemon. Invisible ink. It has the rule Doc has invisible ink on it that says that Ted always, always concocts the, the draft victories for himself. I did. [00:50:03] Speaker A: That's not great. I, I'm gonna say it again. Please vote because as of right now, when we do the next draft episode, next time I'm gonna have to fucking deal with this again. So please vote. Even if you're voting for me. But like, come on, please vote. We need numbers. Because if I say how many people voted, I'm gonna get hungry. [00:50:32] Speaker D: Oh my goodness. [00:50:33] Speaker B: Okay, vote your conscience. But also if you don't vote for Ted. [00:50:35] Speaker A: That's not what I'm saying. [00:50:38] Speaker D: I hear. That's what I'm hearing. Conversation. See, I can't freaking answer Roz's question. To answer Oz's question, it is which Pokemon is most likely to do this or which is the biggest threat if it does go a world ending mode. [00:50:53] Speaker A: And it just goes. Pokemon goes bad and begins to kill, who would it be and what would its motives be likely to do it? [00:51:02] Speaker D: I think it's Not. I think it's dark, right? [00:51:03] Speaker A: It's not most likely. It's just like, who would it be? [00:51:07] Speaker D: Well, he's asking what Pokemon is capable of trying to be world ending here, I think. So it's not going to be mud. It's not Mudkip. [00:51:15] Speaker A: No do. What do you mean you? Didn't you see that one video with Mudkip beat everyone. [00:51:21] Speaker D: Doing nothing? Luigi. [00:51:23] Speaker A: So, yeah, Luke Walton style. [00:51:27] Speaker D: I'm going. I'm going. Darkrai. Darkrai is the, you know, the king of nightmares. He might try to take over the world and make everybody fear him. And you don't want to step outside. You don't want to get put to sleep because you could die in your sleep, you know, Freddy Krueger style. So I think Darkrai is probably the biggest. The biggest threat to humanity at this point outside of, you know, like Arceus or something. But I don't think Arceus would do. He's benevolent. That's my guy right there. He wouldn't. He wouldn't do that. [00:51:55] Speaker A: Do you say Arceus or Arceus? [00:51:57] Speaker D: It is unfortunately, Arceus, because I always tell this fun. This tidbit. The localization team is British and in. In British speech, Arce is ass. So they didn't want to be Assius. So the pronunciation is Arceus. [00:52:14] Speaker A: Oh, well, I'm not paid by Pikachu, so I'm going to just keep saying it wrong. [00:52:19] Speaker D: I have no. Listen, I wish it was Arceus, but it can't be. Also in legend, Za. When you have your rotom phone or your. Your. It's called your Arc phone, right? It's not called the arse phone. It's not a butt phone, but is. [00:52:33] Speaker A: It an arc phone? [00:52:35] Speaker D: It's Arc. It's Arc. Yeah. [00:52:37] Speaker A: Yeah. Then obviously it's not going to be. [00:52:39] Speaker D: Like arse, but it's shaped like Arceus. It's literally like it's shaped like. [00:52:45] Speaker A: Really? [00:52:47] Speaker D: Yeah. [00:52:47] Speaker A: That's crazy. These people gotta knock it off. [00:52:52] Speaker D: Cut it out. [00:52:53] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:52:54] Speaker D: Who would you be scared of, Sam? Who would you be scared of? [00:52:57] Speaker C: So here's my answer. What is like the most important price factor or anything that we factor into our daily lives now? [00:53:05] Speaker A: Taxes. [00:53:07] Speaker C: Wrong. It's eggs. That's why execute is the thing that is going to determine the future of our country. Execute holds all the power. And like, I went to Trader Joe's yesterday pretty early. I would say, like, yeah, maybe 11:00am and they had on the signs, you know, one carton per person. They were already sold completely out of eggs. [00:53:31] Speaker D: Wow. [00:53:32] Speaker C: Execute If. If it so chose could destroy our society is my answer to Roz's question. [00:53:39] Speaker A: It's crazy that you say that because I go to my grocery store and there's just like eggs stacked up. No one is buying these eggs. [00:53:48] Speaker C: At Trader Joe's. They're cheaper because it's the same price nationwide. [00:53:52] Speaker A: Are they really cheaper at Trader Joe's? [00:53:55] Speaker C: Yeah. In New York City it is. Yeah. [00:53:56] Speaker A: How about. How much are they at Trader Joe's? I'm learning right now. [00:54:00] Speaker C: I don't know because they were sold out yesterday when I went to go buy eggs. So it could be anything. [00:54:06] Speaker A: It could be $5 for a dozen of eggs. [00:54:10] Speaker C: It could be $5 for five eggs. I wouldn't know. Like, they were already gone yesterday. So anyway, that. That's why execute holds all the cards and that's fairly society. [00:54:23] Speaker A: That's a crazy answer. [00:54:25] Speaker B: Yeah, I'm going. I'm gonna use the same pick again. But I'll. I'll just evolve it this time. I'm going with. I'm going with Blissey. I think. I think the Blissey community has been overshadowed and overlooked. Hear me out. You know, Chancey and Blissey always give off this nurturing mother energy. And like, there was nobody that I hated to disappoint more than my own mother. Now we've just. Okay, we've taken them for granted for all these years. Next to Nurse Joy always there for us. And I think they've had it. You. You know, they're underpaid, they're underappreciated, they don't get the benefits. 401k is dribbling up. So, you know, for a Pokemon that radiates kindness, if you take that away, then what's the difference between Blissey and, I don't know, Mewtwo. Or name another evil Pokemon Dratini. You know, so there's. There's plenty of that. That's. That would be the big issue. That's. They're the core of our Pokemon infrastructure and economy. And if Blissey were to. To turn over, it'd be really bad. So. So that's my answer. [00:55:40] Speaker D: Feel like a single close combat from any Pokemon stops thwarts the bussy brigade. [00:55:51] Speaker A: I'm sorry. To the audio listeners. My answer is going to be a visual aid. Take a look at this guy and don't. Don't tell me he doesn't look like somebody. [00:56:05] Speaker D: Oh my God, you're such an idiot. Dude. [00:56:07] Speaker A: What do you mean? [00:56:09] Speaker D: He's like 2ft tall and in one region. [00:56:14] Speaker A: So he's not. [00:56:15] Speaker D: He's not taking over the world. [00:56:17] Speaker A: But look at. He looks a lot like a guy who is. [00:56:22] Speaker D: Oh, my goodness, just like Mike into Professor Oak. [00:56:27] Speaker A: My real answer. I. I put a picture of the gumshoes, the Pokemon that looks like a certain president. The real answer is. And I'm gonna take this answer from Wolfie Glick, who got asked once, what's a Pokemon that's on YouTube spreading. Right. Ring propaganda, and it's Incineroar. He's wearing the mag. He's wearing the mega hat. He's. He's calling everyone Soy boy. [00:56:55] Speaker D: He's just using. He's using DEI as a substitute for slurs. [00:56:59] Speaker A: He's just poisoning the minds of everyone. [00:57:03] Speaker D: Classic Incinera. [00:57:04] Speaker A: The Joe. Joe Rogan of the Pokemon world. [00:57:07] Speaker D: Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Incineroar wouldn't. Wouldn't have the. Wouldn't have that Spotify contract. [00:57:15] Speaker A: I don't know. He's having. Professor. Oh, come on. To talk about how, like, Pokemon evolution's not actually real. You are. You're the Pokemon. [00:57:29] Speaker D: Gardevoirs attorney, you know. [00:57:30] Speaker A: Yeah, yeah, yeah, exactly. [00:57:32] Speaker D: Not finishing that one. [00:57:34] Speaker A: All right, last question, and it's gonna take a while to parse through, so I'm gonna. We're gonna go individually on it. But which Pokemon would you draft number one overall in each of the big three sports? We'll start with basketball. [00:57:49] Speaker C: Stephen A. Smith, the future Democratic presidential nominee. [00:57:53] Speaker A: Yeah, yeah. [00:57:54] Speaker C: Asked a couple years ago who he would take in a one on one between LeBron and Mewtwo. And I believe it was. [00:58:04] Speaker D: Believe it was Moo2 Sam, as he pronounced it. [00:58:08] Speaker C: As Stephen A. Pronounced it. But Stephen A. Obviously comes from a basketball background, not a Pokemon background. So he was very inclined to just go with LeBron. And it's an idiotic thing, but as he was sort of breaking down Mewtwo's size, his tail, his abilities, he was sort of talking himself into being an even battle. And so as someone who has more of a Pokemon background, like having played the games, I really don't think it's a debate. Like, if we're having a draft, obviously I don't know all. How many generations are there? Seven, Eight at this point? [00:58:42] Speaker A: Nine or nine? [00:58:44] Speaker B: Good Lord. [00:58:45] Speaker C: Well, I don't know seven of the generations then. But if I'm at the podium with the number one pick in my hand, I'm writing Mewtwo down and handing it to Adam Silver. [00:58:57] Speaker A: I want to. I want to. So Mewtwo, seven feet tall. And if I'm remembering the Has a nerve. [00:59:05] Speaker D: He's good under pressure. [00:59:06] Speaker A: If I remember. If I remember the clip correctly, he says psychic type so he could get inside LeBron's head. I believe it's something he had concluded, too. I. I said this. I think I said this to you, Joe, when we were playing Marvel Rivals once, because we love these clips. And I. And I said to you. I was like, if Stephen A. Smith's whole job was just, like, answering these questions, I would. Stephen A. Smith would be on my television 24 7. I would never not be watching him. [00:59:39] Speaker D: Yes. [00:59:40] Speaker A: And my. One of my favorite ones is like. I think it's the, like, which of the Kanto starters. Who are you picking? And he's describing, like, Blastoise with cannons. And my favorite tweet of all time is my. Me trying not to break down in my 2015 Honda SUV crying about my divorce as my kid in the background is talking about Pokemon. It's the Steven. He's been going Blastoise got cannons. [01:00:12] Speaker D: Yeah. Not as. What is. It's not. He doesn't say. Not as docile. He says something about the. About character. Charizard's claws and how that can help. Yeah. He says unlike. Unlike Venusaur, you know. [01:00:30] Speaker A: John, who are you picking? 1. One in the draft for basketball? [01:00:35] Speaker B: Bulbasaur, without a doubt. And the reason is Bulbasaur is not too big. Good point guard size, but has. Oh, God, I'm gonna get. I'm gonna get roasted for this. But he's got the. I'm sorry. [01:00:53] Speaker D: No. Do you think you're good? [01:00:55] Speaker B: Yeah. He's got. He's got. They're not tentacles. What are they? The vines. [01:00:59] Speaker D: Vines. [01:00:59] Speaker B: He's got the vines, right? He's got the vines. Could get a loose ball. Can go up, get a rebound. [01:01:05] Speaker C: He's getting the passing lanes right. [01:01:07] Speaker B: Exactly. And that's. That's very underrated. When you talk to coaches and they talk about things that don't show up on the stat sheets, it's deflections and getting in the passing lane. There's nobody else that'll get in the passing lane like Bulbasaur. I'm fine with taking Ivysaur as well. Maybe a little bit faster. [01:01:22] Speaker A: I was gonna. I was looking up those numbers for you if you wanted to change your answer. Ivysaur is a little bit faster. [01:01:31] Speaker B: Ivysaur is a little bit faster. But, you know, Bulbasaur, on a rookie contract, you still have him until he evolves to Ivysaur. You know, once you get an Ivysaur to. To a Venusaur, then it's over now. It's just you're clogging the lane. It's like having Shaquille O'Neal on the Celtics. [01:01:46] Speaker A: I want, I, I want you to know Bulbasaur is 2ft tall. So I don't know what, what a perfect point guard size is. Venusaur is 6ft tall. [01:02:00] Speaker B: Question for Sam, who is a resident basketball ball knower, how did Mugsy Bog fare in the NBA? [01:02:07] Speaker C: I mean, listen, he lasted. He had like a 10 plus year career. [01:02:11] Speaker B: Right. You know? [01:02:12] Speaker C: Right. And he would. You have vines, right? [01:02:17] Speaker D: You didn't even need vines. Nate Robinson won those contests without vines. [01:02:21] Speaker C: Right. [01:02:22] Speaker B: Here's my other argument. Sam. If you had to judge Blake Griffin's career as an NBA player, how would you judge it? [01:02:30] Speaker C: I would say there was some untapped potential there. [01:02:33] Speaker B: Right. But he had a, he had a very good career. Long career. [01:02:36] Speaker C: Yeah. [01:02:37] Speaker B: The issue is that he was a 11 pick. But many teams and I think at one point every team in the league would love to have a Blake Griffin on their team. So you know, because he was picked one one, everyone looks at him like Lebron James or in that ilk of being a top overall player, Akeem Olajuwon, so on and so forth. But teams would love to have Blake Griffin on their team. Every team would love to have a two foot point guard that could get in the passing lane and has good vines. So I'm going with Bulbasaur all day, baby. [01:03:05] Speaker D: Every team. [01:03:06] Speaker A: All right, Joe one one who's draft boards wide open for you. [01:03:11] Speaker D: So this is our second Mugsy Bogues reference of this first round here. But I posted the photo for Perez and Sam. This is Marshadow so I can now talking about him. So he is a ghost fighting type, a little bit taller than, than Bulbasaur. So I got you on the hype, but still in the mugsy bugs category, he's able to slip in and out of existence. So as a ghost type. So he's elusive. You're not gonna be able to foul. We can't hack a shack the Marshadow because he's just going to be able to slip out, hold the basketball, get untouched. Can't steal it from him if he's not on the same plane of existence as you are. Very fast pokemon on defense. He's gonna have that Draymond dog in him. As a fighting, you just start punching people on the, on the other end, kicking him in the nuts and still and being surprised he gets punished for kicking people in the nuts. I think Marshadow is going to be my. He's gonna be my all around defender, offensive guy, elusive, gonna be able to move quickly around pass the rock. Well, I think Marshadow's my. My basketball pick. [01:04:17] Speaker A: All right. All right. I gotta go. You know, a wise man, a wise GM said defense wins championships after a big trade happened. So that's why I got to go with follow his lead. I'm going with at standing at a tall.35ft 9 inches. I got to go with Alolan executor. [01:04:40] Speaker D: I knew it was coming. [01:04:41] Speaker A: You're not getting anything by him. He's blocking every shot. Don't know how he. But yeah. [01:04:48] Speaker D: Isn't it just goaltending at all times? [01:04:50] Speaker A: Are. [01:04:50] Speaker D: Are you. You're playing the long game. You're going to give up goaltending to at the hopes of not. You know. [01:04:56] Speaker A: I think if he's standing right in front of you again. It's called rim protection. It. [01:05:01] Speaker C: You're gonna like a taller. A taller Tyson Chandler, basically. [01:05:06] Speaker D: Yeah. [01:05:07] Speaker A: He's gonna. He's very. He's gonna be very physical in the paint. Like and like look and like if the ball. You know, like he's not grabbing the ball. He's not. He's not gonna be like. Like a rebounder type, but he's gonna get the tap out easily. I just like defense with championships. Anthony Davis wins championships. So that's why you gotta go with defense. [01:05:31] Speaker D: First one Exor has a unibrow. [01:05:35] Speaker A: That's he. Well, he has three heads. So. [01:05:41] Speaker D: I thought about it. I'm not gonna lie. I did think about it. [01:05:43] Speaker A: For basketball, football, who you could picks, picks up. You're on the board for football. Who you taking? I'll go first. I. I'm take. I think you always hear it. Football's one in the trenches. I believe is a saying. Is that correct? I don't know if I am. I'm taking Reggie Steele either center or one of the tackles. I don't. I think it's gonna be very hard to move him around. Get. Get some moves on him. I don't think you're gonna be. Gonna be kind of be. You have to be extra physical to get by him. And I don't think you will be. [01:06:28] Speaker D: The question is before same answers. Hold on one second. To help you out for clarification, is the tush push still legal? [01:06:42] Speaker C: It's as of now. It's legal as of now legal. [01:06:46] Speaker D: So answer accordingly. Okay. [01:06:48] Speaker A: Also. Yeah. And the kickoffs to the 35 or something. I don't know. What? These new kickoff rules. They change it every year. [01:06:56] Speaker D: They punch you in the face. [01:06:57] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:06:59] Speaker C: I was very worried that Ted was going to take my pick when he mentioned winning in the trenches. Because I'm thinking of, like, you know, keep. Like when the Patriots had their dynasty originally, it was, you know, you know, Vince Wolfork in the middle, like, stopping the run, knocking down passes. What if we had a bigger, taller, fatter Vince Wilfork? I'm putting Snorlax at nose tackle. [01:07:22] Speaker A: I had thought about Snorlax. [01:07:24] Speaker C: You are never running the ball on my team. God forbid I drop him back into pass coverage. He's 611 and he can knock down passes. [01:07:34] Speaker D: God forbid. [01:07:37] Speaker C: And, you know, sometimes teams like Sir Joe was sort of alluding to, like, if I put Snorlax behind my quarterback on a tush push, he's not getting. [01:07:47] Speaker D: He's in there. Travis Hunter role right now. It's nose tackle, running back. [01:07:53] Speaker C: Right. He's a fat. Travis Hunter is sort of what I'm going for. Work ethic is a little bit of a concern, but I think that we'll be able to. [01:08:04] Speaker D: Could have that flute handy on the side. [01:08:07] Speaker C: Right. I can't remember the last time a defensive tackle went number one. I don't think, like, sue didn't go number one. [01:08:12] Speaker A: No. [01:08:13] Speaker C: Like the last time. [01:08:14] Speaker D: Mario Williams. Right. [01:08:16] Speaker C: He was an edge rusher, though. Like a guy in the middle. [01:08:19] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:08:20] Speaker C: I think we're gonna make. We're gonna make history here. We're gonna take Snorlax. [01:08:25] Speaker A: Yeah. I was debating Snorlax. He was. I was like, do I go Snorlax to really clog up the lanes? I'm like, no, you got to protect the qb. You gotta, like, make sure you got that clean pocket. Because if I'm going with, like, Matthew Stafford over my home side, I gotta keep that pocket clean for him. [01:08:42] Speaker D: Yeah. That's why I. That's why I wanted to have the tush push. Clarification. Because Snorlax. Snorlax on the tush push is obviously unstoppable. [01:08:49] Speaker C: Yeah. Game changer. [01:08:51] Speaker D: He's a less attractive. Jalen hurts out there. [01:08:54] Speaker C: Well, to you, maybe. [01:08:57] Speaker D: Love is love, Sam. I get it. I get it. [01:08:59] Speaker C: Exactly. [01:09:00] Speaker A: Joe is more appealing to Lucario types. [01:09:04] Speaker D: You shut your. Oh, my God. We kill you. [01:09:11] Speaker A: Joe. You are on the board. [01:09:15] Speaker D: Foundational football, as we have mentioned, is one in the trenches. And if Sandra Bullock has taught us anything, it's important to have a good blind side protecting the quarterback. So I'm taking a Left tackle, which has been first overall picks. You do see first overall picks out of left tackles. [01:09:36] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:09:36] Speaker D: Compared to nose tackles. And I'm taking Hariyama with them big. [01:09:41] Speaker A: Hands going and I'm running the replacements route. [01:09:47] Speaker D: The exclusively pass protection. I'm passing the ball. I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm west coast offense aerating it out here because what, because what? I think Hari, I'm gonna have a tough time getting, getting up from, from the three point stance with those hands. They're very, very heavyweight photo or forward. So I wanted to be in pass protection mode at all times. And good luck for Aiden Hutchinson trying to rush past those hands that Hariyama has. Just absolutely good luck. It's not, it's not happening. I'm, I'm keeping my blind side protected at all times. [01:10:20] Speaker A: I think we're all going very O line D line centric. [01:10:24] Speaker C: It's a very late 90s drafts. [01:10:27] Speaker A: Right. [01:10:28] Speaker D: It's a, it's a nose, hard nose football era here in the draft. [01:10:35] Speaker B: I'll switch it up a little bit. [01:10:36] Speaker D: All right. All right. [01:10:37] Speaker B: I'll go with the skill position. In fact, the most important position in the modern NFL today, and that's at the quarterback position. And I'm going with Gallade. Quick reflexes, sword arm, precision, pinpoint passes. It all starts with the quarterback. You know, you start with a good quarterback, you can build around it. Those franchises don't know how to do that. But when you get a good quarterback in the room, you need to build around him. So I'm going with Gallade. [01:11:05] Speaker D: I like these psychic types so he could get in the defense. [01:11:11] Speaker A: Hey, you know what? Also he's a fighter. [01:11:13] Speaker D: He is a fighter. [01:11:15] Speaker A: He's an every down kind of guy. [01:11:17] Speaker D: He's gonna stay through wear and tear. [01:11:19] Speaker A: I got. Here's my question about Gallade. Is he a gym rat? Is he a first and last out kind of guy? Someone you'll let date your daughter? [01:11:29] Speaker D: Absolutely. [01:11:30] Speaker A: All right. [01:11:31] Speaker D: Without a question. [01:11:32] Speaker A: And finally, baseball, who is your number one pick? John, you're on the board. [01:11:42] Speaker B: I mean there's a lot of good picks. Yeah, I would say. See, because is Tommy John a thing in the scenario? [01:11:54] Speaker A: Yes, if the tush is a thing. [01:11:56] Speaker D: Pokemon can get injured. [01:11:57] Speaker A: Yes, yes. If the touch push is the thing. Tommy John is the thing. [01:12:01] Speaker B: Because it's like, do I want. [01:12:05] Speaker C: Like. [01:12:05] Speaker B: For instance, what I want Greninja to be my best pitcher, you know, or do I go with, you know, like exadrill at third base? Like what do I do here? [01:12:18] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:12:19] Speaker B: Like, that's. [01:12:20] Speaker A: Well, you see, here's the thing. In football and basketball, you kind of draft for need, right? Sometimes in basketball, you draft best, but in baseball, you always draft best talent available because they're going to be in the minors for a couple years developing. [01:12:37] Speaker D: So. [01:12:38] Speaker B: Yeah, right. No, I mean, I could do a cop out answer and just say Lucario for all these answers, because I think Lucario is probably the best athlete, natural Pokemon. Because Mewtwo is, you know, created. So, hey, you know what? Chicks dig the long ball. I'm going with Dragonite. Absolute unit. Home run king. Sweet, kind, but could send the ball into orbit. [01:13:03] Speaker D: He plays right field field, and he just flies up to catch. [01:13:07] Speaker A: Field style. [01:13:08] Speaker D: Exactly. [01:13:09] Speaker B: If people liked Vladimir Guerrero, they're gonna love Dragonite. [01:13:15] Speaker D: I just. I can't wait to see Dragonite defend that Yankee Stadium short porch and just hop right up. [01:13:22] Speaker B: Literally just stand there and catch the ball in his face. [01:13:25] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:13:27] Speaker C: Well, now I feel like an idiot for using up my teleport idea for my personal life when I could have a center fielder who could teleport and get anything. But I'm gonna go a different route. I'm gonna go with one of my favorite archetypes, which is sort of like stocky power hitter with an absolute laser. And that would be Blastoise. [01:13:54] Speaker D: Oh, that's a nice cleanup hitter right there. [01:13:58] Speaker C: Right. I mean, I'm worried after a couple years, I'm gonna have to move into first base, but I think I can stick him in a corner for now in the outfield and get some production. And he's a little. I just looked him up, but he's apparently only 5 3, which I don't love. [01:14:14] Speaker D: He's a short kid. [01:14:15] Speaker C: Yeah, he is a short king. He probably does not have a ton of range, being perfectly honest, but I think that's a guy that we're easily Penciling in for 40 homers a year, minimum. [01:14:27] Speaker D: I am trying to find this article on the Pokemon website because they actually just released this back during opening day a bit ago, which is just fun. [01:14:36] Speaker A: Well, we don't got time for research, Joe. [01:14:39] Speaker D: No, well, it's for additional purposes. Okay, you dingus. Lucario made the baseball team, by the way, in case you're wondering. [01:14:47] Speaker A: Disgusting. [01:14:50] Speaker D: I will show you my Pokemon choice and explain it to you. [01:14:58] Speaker C: Visual aids here. [01:15:00] Speaker D: Yes, I'm trying to help. [01:15:02] Speaker C: Especially for the audio of listeners. [01:15:03] Speaker D: Yeah, for our audio listeners. I can't find it. I'll find it. Whatever. Yes. So Armor Rouge is a Pokemon for the new games. Trying. I can't find the PO like the actual card that they posted on the website, but they took every position on the field and had Pokemon in each spot. Right. And so Arma Rouge has an attack called Armor Cannon, and it's basically Nolan Ryan out on the field. He puts the poke. He puts the baseball in his gun, which. Yes, he has a gun on the field. It's. It's, It's. It's legal. It's sticky stuff. Legal. The umpires approved it. And it shoots it out at just laser speed. So that's my Paul skin. Thank you. He puts the ball there. He doesn't. The catcher doesn't even matter. They just put a one down every time because you know the heat's coming. You know, Nolan Ryan's throwing that fastball, and it's going to be 1, 2, 3, 1, 2, 3. Every inning. [01:16:01] Speaker A: I don't know. I think he's not. He doesn't have pitch ability. Very. A flat fastball that does. Nothing's very hittable. I think Blastoise and Dragonite are feasting on that every time. Poor. And also poor splits. [01:16:18] Speaker C: Mariana only threw one pitch, and it worked out pretty fine. [01:16:21] Speaker A: But that's a pitch that's moving. That pitch has natural movement. [01:16:25] Speaker D: It's just moving. It's moving at thousands of miles an hour. [01:16:28] Speaker A: It's going straight. [01:16:31] Speaker D: Not so. Not only is the Mariano comparison apropos because what did the Pokemon company choose to make Armor Rouge on. On their. On their baseball roster? Oh, only the closer on the team. [01:16:46] Speaker A: See, you never draft a closer. That's the number one problem, and that's. [01:16:49] Speaker C: What'S going to hurt. One. One. [01:16:51] Speaker A: Yeah. You're insane. And for that show. [01:16:55] Speaker D: First of all. Hold on. What about. What about Clay Holmes? Okay? He went from closer to opening day starting pitcher for the Mets in six. In five months. So. [01:17:06] Speaker A: Did you watch that? [01:17:07] Speaker C: Completely honest here. I don't want to speak for Perez here, the resident Mets fan, but in what universe are you taking a guy who's ceiling is Clay Holmes at 1 1? [01:17:15] Speaker D: Yeah. No, I'm just making a joke. I'm just taking a dig at the Mets that's a pure Mets dig, not an actual point. Just want to make it clear. [01:17:26] Speaker A: I want Press to defend himself. [01:17:28] Speaker B: Opening day starter Clay Holmes unseating Buddy Carlisle. [01:17:35] Speaker D: Listen, you're. He's. But you're not. He could throw for nine. It's a gun. It's a gun. He's bringing a gun on the field, and the umpires are allowing it. He's gonna strike everybody out. [01:17:45] Speaker C: Also like, if they're already considering doing something with the torpedo bats, they're not going to let the gun closer. [01:17:51] Speaker A: Yeah, know Joe's just trying to torpedo bat his way to a victory. Taking a reliever one one insane draft strategy. He'd get laughed out of the building. Even Billy Bean's laughing at you, Joe. [01:18:05] Speaker D: He doesn't have to be a reliever. It's analytics. I can throw him in. I can throw him in whatever innings I want. He's not getting Tommy John. He's shooting a gun. [01:18:15] Speaker C: Yeah. [01:18:16] Speaker A: Oh, so he's not using his hand and that. He's not a pitcher. [01:18:19] Speaker D: It is in his hand. I'm saying he's not. [01:18:22] Speaker A: But he's not throwing the ball. But he's not throwing the ball. He's not throwing the ball. [01:18:27] Speaker B: Right. It's not, you know, starting. Imagine. [01:18:30] Speaker A: No, it's not. It's going out of the cannon. [01:18:32] Speaker D: His hands are spoiler alert. His hands make the cannon. Do you see the photo? [01:18:38] Speaker A: Yeah. And that's not him. And that's not him throwing the ball. [01:18:42] Speaker B: Hold on. Imagine if Mariano Rivera went to the mound and brought a fungo bat and just started hitting it at the plate. You can't allow that. Yeah, for the same reason you can't allow a cannon. [01:18:53] Speaker D: Well, what about Mario? Mario sluggers, okay? They're using some. Some funky shenanigans. [01:18:58] Speaker A: That's a video game, bro. This is real life. [01:19:01] Speaker B: Video game is not real life. [01:19:02] Speaker D: This is real life. That's true. This is real life. Okay, you know what? [01:19:07] Speaker B: Everyone on this pod and listening is now dumber for having heard that argument. Joe, take away all your points. [01:19:14] Speaker A: Joe, be quiet. You're embarrassing yourself. [01:19:17] Speaker D: I will. I will leave this call. I will leave this call. If. If I The only. Listen. Ted can say it. The only person I can never hear say I'm embarrassing myself is. Is Perez. When Perez says it, I get so irate that I'm gonna leave the call. [01:19:33] Speaker A: All right. I gotta. I didn't even think who I'm. I'm drafting for baseball. Do I want a pitch ability type of guy? What's our favorite saying every time the draft rolls around? John? He could be a. Could be a number one ace if he just develops a third pitch. Or do I. I'm trying to think, is there a two way guy? Someone who we think could do both? [01:20:00] Speaker D: Yeah, I think, I think, I think Zara Aura could do it. [01:20:04] Speaker A: Ooh. I was thinking actually, as much as. [01:20:07] Speaker D: Not only that said, he's as fast as lightning. Okay. [01:20:10] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:20:11] Speaker D: Lightning's Pretty fast. I don't know if we're familiar. [01:20:12] Speaker A: What if I just go Reggie Lucky. [01:20:16] Speaker D: That was my. That was my other choice. [01:20:17] Speaker A: Slap it. Just not. I'm. I'm done with the two way slap hitter. But what easy 150 stolen bases a year? [01:20:26] Speaker D: I mean, that's, that's value. That's the. A walks as good as a hit. That's what they say. He's gonna get to third. He's gonna get to third on a bun. [01:20:34] Speaker A: That's what I'm saying. I like, I got like the new age Billy Hamilton here or you know. [01:20:39] Speaker D: Show some respect and say Ricky Henderson. [01:20:41] Speaker A: But Ricky Henderson. But Ricky Henderson could actually hit. Is. That's my. Yeah, that's my difference. Like, Reggie Lecky's not hitting for power. Let's be honest. [01:20:51] Speaker D: Just to boost Sam's argument here, the Pokemon company chose Blastoise as their right. [01:20:56] Speaker A: Fielder because he's putting the ball in his cannon. He's not putting the ball in his cannon, bro. [01:21:02] Speaker C: I think. But going back to my Blastoise thing, like, I think it works better if we're a team like, like the Yankees or the Astros where you have like a really small corner. Boston, like put him in left at Fenway. [01:21:12] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:21:13] Speaker C: Like, I think if we put him in a big. Like, put him in left field at Yankee Stadium is asking for a disaster. [01:21:18] Speaker D: They quite literally said, we hear that Blastoise has an absolute cannon out in right field. [01:21:25] Speaker A: Like, is he DHing at Comerica? Because no way. He's like, you know where you want him in, in the outfield. [01:21:33] Speaker D: There the debt out. No, he can't DH because Tinkerton is. [01:21:38] Speaker A: Well, thinking not on Sam's team. I'm asking Sam, right? [01:21:42] Speaker C: I'm thinking like, I think we just have to kind of wear it. [01:21:46] Speaker A: Okay. [01:21:46] Speaker C: I don't know, like. Like if we're the Yankees, like, I'm not putting Stanton in the outfield. It's like in D.H. blastoise, it's. [01:21:53] Speaker A: It's like when the Braves had to put like Evan Gaddis in left field during the playoffs because they already had the McCann as catcher and the Dodgers were just sort of peppering him with balls and like, it was a defensive nightmare for the Braves. I don't know. I feel like goat picking Reggie, like a. A slap hitter. Fast guy is so off brand for me. [01:22:22] Speaker D: But it's value, it's analytics. [01:22:26] Speaker A: I know, but like, if that were true, Billy Hamilton would be the best player of all time. But he's not. [01:22:34] Speaker D: But Ricky Henderson's a Hall of Famer. [01:22:36] Speaker A: Yeah, but Ricky. Like I said, regular. Not having the power Ricky Henderson has. [01:22:41] Speaker D: He doesn't need it. [01:22:43] Speaker C: He's an elite defender, too. With that speed. [01:22:45] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:22:47] Speaker D: I can put it literally will bunt for a triple. He doesn't need power. [01:22:54] Speaker A: And he can play center, but he can play all. All the outfield by himself. We can push everyone up. [01:22:59] Speaker D: Ops is through the roof. [01:23:00] Speaker A: All right, I'm taking Lecky. I hate. No, no, no, no. Hold on. I have to do this to me. I had realized my mistake here. [01:23:11] Speaker D: What happened? [01:23:11] Speaker A: I betrayed my own beliefs. I picked a legendary. [01:23:17] Speaker D: Oh, oh. [01:23:19] Speaker C: Does that mean I retroactively won? The first question. [01:23:23] Speaker A: What? [01:23:24] Speaker C: First one. I'm hearing it. [01:23:26] Speaker A: No, no, because now. No, now I have to change my answer. I. I gave myself the bad take sound. Sam, I have to fix this. [01:23:37] Speaker D: I just want to point out that the Pokemon company has chosen Cinderace as their starting pitcher. And Cinderace is kicking the baseball. [01:23:44] Speaker A: Yeah, and that would never be allowed. Carter Capps wasn't even allowed to jump on the mound. You think they're gonna let him kick? [01:23:52] Speaker D: I'm just saying. I'm trying to be efficient here. [01:23:54] Speaker A: I think I got my power. I'm going power hitter. [01:23:58] Speaker C: And, you know, diagram is a circle with the Pokemon and quarter caps. Nowheres. [01:24:03] Speaker A: Yeah, exactly. I think I. I'm. I think I'm going. I think I got the third baseman of the future here, and I think I got a Max Muncie type. I gotta go with Rilla. Boom. [01:24:18] Speaker D: Ooh. [01:24:19] Speaker A: Thank you. Here's what he looks like. And, you know, I'm a big Dragon Ball Z guy. Big Goku guy. Super Saiyan 3 Goku right here. And I'm saying he's all. He's a drummer, so he knows he can. He's dexterity out there to do this. I think he could be a competent third baseman. I think he's slugging. [01:24:40] Speaker D: I think he'd be a catcher, too. He's got a solid base, solid foundation. [01:24:44] Speaker A: Yeah. But I. I like. I'm. I don't know. I'd. I think I could get more value somewhere else at catcher. But, man, I think. Hold on. I'm putting this on the board. We're gonna actually draft a team of baseball. Pokemon for baseball or, you know, hold on. I'm putting it on the board, but I'm going really? Boom. [01:25:06] Speaker D: I think he's this episode or future episode. Future. [01:25:08] Speaker A: Future episode. [01:25:09] Speaker D: Okay, Okay. [01:25:09] Speaker A: I think he is my guy that's gonna third. He's gonna be my third baseman of the future. He's the guy that's taking it that they're insane. They're putting raging Bull. The guy doesn't have feet. He doesn't hands the catch. [01:25:22] Speaker D: I put. It's not working the right way. Hold on. I'm sorry. But yes, he's a very tall man. So he would. In that. In that. In that short field at. At minimator. It's not minute made anymore. But he'd be the Crawford boxes. There'd never be another home run hit. Because Race. [01:25:38] Speaker A: That's why. Well, that's. That. That's sort of my alone executor philosophy a little bit. [01:25:45] Speaker D: Yeah. Why is the top photo not showing what the heck is going on? [01:25:49] Speaker A: I don't know. I'm sorry, but I'm going gorilla. [01:25:51] Speaker C: Boom. [01:25:52] Speaker A: I think he's gonna be a good third. Like he's a third baseman you can rely on and he's going to hit for power. He is my Max Muny. I'm here to stand my square boy muny. And that's why I'm picking Rilla. Boom. [01:26:08] Speaker D: I respect it. [01:26:09] Speaker A: Thank you. Like I said, I had to change my. I think. Oh, no. I got to change my football answer too. [01:26:15] Speaker D: Who's your legend? [01:26:16] Speaker A: I put Reggie Steel. [01:26:19] Speaker D: You're just. You're. You're. [01:26:20] Speaker A: I am breaking. I am a fraud. [01:26:22] Speaker D: Fraud cities. [01:26:25] Speaker A: I can't win these episodes. You're. John Perez is poisoning your mind with this information. [01:26:34] Speaker D: That's what he looks like. [01:26:35] Speaker A: Hold on. [01:26:35] Speaker D: Try hitting a home run. Try hitting a home run over that Perez. [01:26:39] Speaker B: That's a good point. But he needs to be on all four, so I don't know how he's catching. [01:26:44] Speaker A: Yeah, I don't know how he's hitting either with this cloud. [01:26:46] Speaker D: The cloud on his neck. [01:26:48] Speaker A: That's not What. How is he hitting? How is he hitting? [01:26:54] Speaker D: Listen, you take the elite defense. The. You. You take it. You take the. [01:26:59] Speaker A: It's that. It's that espionation video of like, what if Barry Bonds just went up the bat. Went up the bat without a bat. [01:27:07] Speaker D: Yeah, you take the. The. The defensive run saved metrics of value of raging volt for him batting ninth in the lineup. [01:27:15] Speaker A: All right, I. All right. I'm trying to think of who I'm actually drafting for football, and all I can think about is that Fred Far Dragon ball Z picture. Are you guys. Are you guys familiar with this? I know Joe is because we. We always laugh about it. [01:27:34] Speaker D: Yes, we'll send it to you. [01:27:38] Speaker A: I found it. I found it. I found it. [01:27:41] Speaker D: So many good visual aids. On this audio podcast, it's. [01:27:46] Speaker A: I Love this. The Vikings 0 Saiyans 56. And what is. What is John Madden saying here? Barb is clearly off his game today after 19 years of watching him play. I've never seen such a low performance. All right, who am I taking? I think I'm taking skill position. I think I'm gonna. Who can be my Travis Hunter? First time? [01:28:17] Speaker D: That's probably Greninga. [01:28:20] Speaker A: No, because I don't think he could. [01:28:24] Speaker D: Be slot receiver and lockdown corner. [01:28:27] Speaker A: No, because I don't think he's got the physicality to be a lockdown corner. [01:28:32] Speaker D: He's got the tongue. You just get it. Like. [01:28:35] Speaker A: Like he. Like he won't be able to cover, like a DK Metcoff type. [01:28:40] Speaker D: He just shoots some. Some little goo. Some little frog goo on Metcalf cleats. [01:28:45] Speaker A: Disgusting. [01:28:47] Speaker D: And then Metcalf is a little slower with the cleats, I think. [01:28:52] Speaker A: I think. I think I gotta go blaze again. Got a little bit of a fighter in him. Has a good, good. Ran a good 40, you know, great vertical. Great vertical fight. Can fight for those 50, 50 balls. So, you know, I think that's my Travis Hunter. [01:29:15] Speaker D: Pretty good answer. [01:29:16] Speaker A: Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. [01:29:18] Speaker D: Too educate. Win. You know. [01:29:19] Speaker A: Yeah. Too bad I can't. Exactly, Joe. Exactly. Too bad I can't win. All right, now, I'm calculating the scores here, and if you're wondering, Joe's not the winner. [01:29:34] Speaker D: Shocker. [01:29:35] Speaker A: Because we could. We couldn't let the conspiracies run that deep. [01:29:39] Speaker D: Yeah, understandable. How would I say people don't. People don't like Mariana Rivera. [01:29:46] Speaker A: Apparently, if people don't like Derek Jeter. Congratulations, Sam, for winning the Pokemon episode. [01:29:55] Speaker C: Wow. [01:29:56] Speaker D: Big Man Blastoise pulled it through. [01:29:58] Speaker B: Noted Pokemon expert means a lot to. [01:30:00] Speaker C: Me as someone who only really knows the first two generations and was competing against an actual Pokemon expert and also Joe Brown. It just means a lot to me to. To pull off what I consider possibly the biggest upset in Yapov history. [01:30:20] Speaker A: Apparently, the biggest upset is going to be whoever wins a draft that's not me. Which is. [01:30:25] Speaker C: Right. [01:30:26] Speaker A: Never gonna happen. [01:30:27] Speaker C: Whenever Ted stops putting up facade numbers in the draft episodes, that'll be a big upset. But in the meantime, I'm really proud of this effort. I'm glad that we could finally do some sort of sports and Pokemon overlap. [01:30:40] Speaker A: Well, that we're gonna. This one has inspired us. [01:30:43] Speaker C: A really messed up question for whenever the next episode is. [01:30:47] Speaker A: I will say this episode also inspired a future draft of Pokemon baseball team so I'm excited to see. Do you guys have to research other Pokemon outside the 151? And will we? We will be as scrutinous for these picks like we were for this episode, questioning every single choice. [01:31:09] Speaker C: I'm taking legendaries, though. You can't stop. [01:31:11] Speaker D: Yeah, they have to be. [01:31:12] Speaker A: I will allow. I don't know. Like, I don't want to. I want people just to pick legendaries. [01:31:18] Speaker C: No, but I'm gonna have a couple. [01:31:21] Speaker A: All right, fine. All right. [01:31:23] Speaker C: I'm dealing with the scouts this week now. [01:31:25] Speaker A: Now I'm annoyed I even said the word Reggie Lecky, because John and Sam would have no concept of who that was. [01:31:34] Speaker D: I mean, that's. I was. That was my answer. If it wasn't Armor Rouge, I was gonna say Reggie Lucky. So. [01:31:40] Speaker A: Yeah, but, like, we know who that is. They don't. [01:31:45] Speaker D: Well, I guess I just say Chancey for every answer and get there. [01:31:48] Speaker C: You know, Perez and I are going to be like the. The old people scouts in Moneyball. [01:31:53] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:31:55] Speaker D: He's got an ugly girlfriend. [01:31:57] Speaker C: He's got ugly girlfriend. We can't take him. Like, he acts like he can't learn. New attacks. We're getting him out of here. [01:32:04] Speaker A: Like, oh. As I brought up, next episode is a draft episode. Please vote. I beg of you. I cannot. Am I going to have to wear this cross forever if I win next? I. I have looked at the numbers. I fear for my life if I announce the winner next week. So vote with your conscience. But also, please keep me in your heart, as that might be the last time you listen to me. I will announce the next draft is a cartoon draft. Non anime division. Anyways, thanks for watching. Thanks for listening. Do whatever SEO stuff it does to help people find this podcast. Appreciate it or not appreciate it. You know, if you're that kind of person that needs the little. A little hate to get out. Get. Get you to do the work in. I've been your host, Ted. The last piece of media I watched was Val Kilmer rest in peace's 1984 classic, Top Secret.